Words of Encouragement about Listening Prayer

Hello, God.

Hello, Nathanael.

I was reminded recently of how helpful it can be to hear words of encouragement, especially when trying something that is new. With that in mind, I was thinking it’d be good to offer some words of support and encouragement about starting (and continuing) one’s own listening prayer project.

This is a great idea. I’ve shared some encouraging words in previous conversations and I’d love to repeat them here.

Fantastic -- please do!

First and foremost, I want every one of you to know that I want to hear from each of you. No matter how stilted or uncomfortable it may feel to talk to me and listen for me, know that I am delighted to hear from you. I want to hear from you in the same way a loving parent wants to hear from their child(ren) – where the topic doesn’t have to matter, just the interaction is a gift. I am your #1 fan.

Remember, you can tell me whatever is on your mind. I am not offended by your thoughts or how you communicate those thoughts. I will not reject you if you choose the “wrong” words (whatever it is that you think is “wrong”). Instead, I will rejoice because we are in contact.

Second and just as importantly, I want each and every one of you to hear from me. There are so many voices in the world that distort. These voices are amplified by those who wish to remain where they are by keeping you where you are. Truly I tell you that these voices do not reflect the truth of who you are. Hear my voice so that you can hear the truth of who you are through my words and my eyes. Hear that you belong to me.

Keep in mind the parable of the prodigal son when talking with me. Maybe you think you are like the younger sibling, who, for various reasons, thinks we have grown too far apart. Or maybe you are like the older sibling who is responsible, but is also quite frustrated with my choices. In both cases, remember that my response is one of love. I embrace the younger sibling upon return and I reassure the elder sibling that we are still a team.

A thought that comes to mind about the prodigal son parable is how much dissatisfaction the children have. The youngest chose to leave. The eldest took the risk that it was okay to complain. And yet, the parent does not express dissatisfaction in return. Instead, in a way that each child would understand, the parent embraces them.

That is a good observation! Feeling frustrated or dissatisfied with me is something that happens. But don’t let those feelings keep you away from me. Talk about those feelings with me. If you are angry with me, tell me why. If you are ignoring me for a reason, tell me the reason. If you blame me for something, let me know about it. Even if you hate me, I want to know why. I will listen. And, I promise you that the most important and primary part of my response, should you choose to listen for my response, will be to remind you that I will not leave you, that I go where you go, that I love you.

This seems important to highlight. So often people feel distant from you because something in life happened in a negative way and we interpret those results as a reflection of how you feel about us. But what you’re saying is to keep the lines of communication open regardless of what happens. In that on-going communication, how you are actually with us will be revealed.

This is true. I am with each of you, but you may not initially see or understand how I am with you. When a child points for something they want, a parent might say, “Use your words.” The same is true for me. What you are looking at in the physical world is not the whole story. And, the thing you are seeing may not even be the thing that I am “pointing” at. Instead, invite me to use my words. Let our conversations be your guidance.

That’s an interesting analogy. We do treat you (more often than we’d like to admit, I think) like a young child who mostly can’t talk. But you’re saying our connection with you is best forged through communication in listening prayer rather than interpreting your desire through events that happen in the world, right?

Yes! Through my words, you will know that I am with you and how I am with you. In your imagination, receive my imagery, words, and ideas of comfort and direction. Know that you are understood. “See” yourself and others through my eyes.

I want to say that it is this experience of “seeing” that I’ve found most valuable in the listening prayer process. And, it is this gift of insight that I would want everyone else to experience, too. However, I’m not sure everyone will find the gift of insight as important or as enticing as I have, so I’m not sure how to talk about that outcome within the context of “encouragement.”

I hope you choose to speak of your personal experience as a form of encouragement. To “witness” is to share what you’ve seen and experienced. You are correct in understanding that your witness of listening prayer will not be universal. This is by design. Your singular experience of me is an incomplete experience of me. Do not forget the Uncertainty Prayer Principle.

Oh, I had not thought to apply the Uncertainty Prayer Principle to witnessing. That is a helpful reminder – thank you! With that in mind, then, I’d like to witness to my experience of listening prayer as a form of encouragement.

Good! You were saying that listening prayer provides insight. How does that work for you?

Overall, listening prayer helps me see other options – which then offers me different ways to move forward. And in those conversations with you, I am reminded that you are with me even as the situations feel like everything is against me. A recent example of this occurred as I was going through a difficult transition time in my life. In my listening prayer sessions, you kept repeating a phrase. You kept telling me to “grieve, forgive, and give thanks.”

So, I enacted that phrase. And I learned some things by doing it. I realized that the grieving allowed me to identify and acknowledge what I had lost while the forgiving help me let go of the hard edges I had against the people and their decisions that had brought about my time of transition. But by practicing thanksgiving, I was able to look beyond what I had lost and acknowledge what I still had. Sounds like a helpful process, right? However, I would forget about it until I was reminded during my listening prayer time. Not only, then, did I become aware of “grieve, forgive, and give thanks” through my listening prayer practice, but it was also my daily listening prayer time that kept reminding me to practice those words.

That is just one example of how your words have illuminated a path forward that I could not see on my own. In so many areas of my life, I have often found myself stuck. And, when I feel stuck, I become convinced that I will remain stuck, that the obstacles I am facing are too severe to overcome. But you help me see the things that are available for me to do. For example, you helped me to see that I could write my own Sunday school lesson plans (early on in my Director of Christian Education career). Later, you supported my rather insecure thought about starting my own website (rfour.org) as a way to share those lesson plans with other people. Most recently, you have prompted me to focus on this listening prayer project. I was resistant because I could not see how the effort would be worth it. But, due to previous experiences with you, I trusted enough to act on what I was hearing. And even then, it wasn’t until eight or nine months later that I could see the value of this project. It has given me focus and purpose during a time of loneliness and flux. Furthermore, I’m starting to realize that this project can be the helpful next step for readers of “Chaos and the Kingdom.”

Though these may seem like big things, I want emphasize that my experience of listening prayer is that you start small. And, you go rather slowly, God. You move far slower than I want to go. But, as I trust the small things, as I start to trust your voice, then I also start to trust the actions I think I am to take.

So much of listening prayer is about building trust. When you start listening for me, you might be frustrated because fireworks (of a symbolic nature) are not immediately happening. If this is true for you, reader, do not be discouraged! Keep talking to me and keep listening. Together, we’ll get there!

While the ideas have often started small for me, I do want to say that I had maybe two or three moments where I intensely felt your presence, God. Those moments happened much earlier in my listening prayer experience. At this point, though, there’s definitely a settled feeling I have of you being present. Your presence isn’t even a question for me, anymore. Maybe my experience is similar to an early dating experience versus knowing a partner after 20 years?

Your experience, Nathanael, is one worth noting for those who feel distant from me and want to change that feeling. The early, strong emotional experiences will vary, but the more a person practices listening prayer, the more connected to me a person will feel. It may take some time for this feeling and understanding to coalesce, though. How long would you say it took for you, Nathanael?

I’m not sure. I was a reluctant learner so it was probably six or seven years before I noticed how my understanding of you had changed. I was doing church work that I didn’t really want to do but it was the best available employment option. I held that whole situation against you. But, to do church work without engaging with you seemed foolish. So, I kept practicing listening prayer, but in a rather angry-like fashion. I didn’t really understand what I was doing with listening prayer or what the results would be. If there had been someone who had gone through the experience previously and could communicate to me what the overall, general process involved, things probably would’ve gone faster for me. But, then again, maybe not. I am pretty resistant to new ideas.

Yes, you were a reluctant student because you were angry with me. Your circumstances make your timeline somewhat unique. But what is helpful about your experience is that it highlights how a commitment to practicing listening prayer eventually leads to knowing me and trusting me, even to the point of being willing to help others learn about listening prayer themselves. Thank you for keeping at it!

And, fittingly, those are my other words of encouragement: Keep at it, reader! There are many feelings and thoughts that can dissuade you from continuing with listening prayer. In the face of that discouragement, I want to say, “Keep at it!” Initially, the process of “imagining God’s words” will feel awkward and uncomfortable. You might worry that you are doing it wrong. And, after moving through that experience, it could take some time before the results of listening prayer are identified and experienced. Plus, it’s difficult to start a new daily habit, especially when the results are not immediately apparent.

But do not be dissuaded from the practice of listening prayer by these challenges. Keep at it! Commit to making time and space (i.e., quiet and lack of interruption) for a brief, intentional, and daily conversation with God where both you and God are given time to speak. It will change your perspective about God, about yourself, about life, and about the world you live in. I know it is counter-intuitive that something as simple as listening prayer could also be so powerful and life-changing. But it is. So, please, keep at it!

And remember, I want to hear from you, reader, and I want to share with you. I will not be bothered by your invitations to talk, but excited – regardless of the topic! Let us converse!

Yes! Remember that God wants to interact with us during listening prayer. We have an attentive and willing conversational partner awaiting us who knows the best way to engage with each of us via our imaginations.

And, finally – know that you are not alone in this. If you are still feeling stuck, email me using this form (also available on the about page). I can’t promise much, but I will do my best to share a personal word of encouragement regarding any struggles you are experiencing with listening prayer.

Conversely, if you feel called to help and encourage others, then I invite you to share a written listening prayer of you and God talking about listening prayer with me (using the same form). Again, I can’t promise much, but my hope is to eventually create a mosaic on this site of listening prayer conversations from others who are giving voice to their own experiences of hearing God.