How We Hear God

Hello, God.

Hello, Nathanael.

In our previous conversation, we discussed the purpose of The Listening Prayer Project and a number of reasons why the "Uncertainty Prayer Principle" is a central tenent of listening prayer. To be honest, it was a bit of a wild ride.

Uncertainty can lead to unpredictable moments.

Yes, I see that. I'm hoping our next topic might be a little more straightforward. I’d like to talk about the nuts-and-bolts of listening prayer in this entry. Specifically, how can others in their private lives do something similar to what I’m doing for this project?

Yes, this is a good topic to discuss.

So, let’s pretend that I’ve never heard of or done listening prayer before. How do you suggest I start?

For individuals who are just beginning the spiritual practice of listening prayer, it is usually best to begin the process of listening prayer by writing the prayers. And, to avoid the distractions that come with computers, it is probably best that the writing be done by hand.

Why is writing the preferred starting point?

The act of writing helps you to focus. And, should you become distracted or if your mind starts to drift, once you return to the paper, the previously written words will help you remember where you were.

Writing by hand is helpful because it is easier to make comments, draw pictures or diagrams, and it engages the brain in a way that (for most) will be more conducive to listening prayer than typing will be.

Also, after a written listening prayer session, you then have a written reminder that you can return to. Just like you referred to a previous prayer at the start of this prayer, the same ability to review previous conversations with me is available to any person who writes their listening prayers. In fact, that can be a helpful way to start each listening prayer session – by reviewing your previous written listening prayer.

What I’m hearing is that it's sort of like how, as kids, we learned to print before we learned to write in cursive. In other words, once we get more familiar with the basics, listening prayer doesn’t always have to be done via writing, right?

That’s a good analogy. “Walk before you run” is another way to put it.

Got it. Thank you. So, I’m sitting down with my pen and paper to write my first listening prayer. How do I start? Where do I start?

You can always start by telling me what you want.

OK, that’s easy. God, I want world peace.

No, you don’t.

Well, I sort of do.

You really don’t care about world peace, Nathanael. Not because you are a calloused soul, but because it seems so impossible to you that you won’t let yourself spend time wanting something so impossible – just like you don’t spend time wanting the Detroit Lions to win a Superbowl.

Wow! Straight to my most sensitive sports team loyalty. But you’re right – I barely want a win from them on Thanksgiving these days, much less a Superbowl win.

So let’s try again: Tell me what you really want.

You mean – like what I want for myself?

Yes.

Well, I want to not waste my life.

Sounds good. What do you think “not wasting your life” looks like?

For me, I think it looks like doing work that will have some sort of influence. Maybe even to the point that the influence of my work outlives my biological life.

Why does the influence have to outlive you?

Maybe it doesn’t? But if my work outlives me, then that means someone found it important – important enough to remember it, even if they don’t remember me.

And that’s how listening prayer works.

Wait! Why are you stopping? I thought we had a good conversation going...

We did. But we were talking as an example of how listening prayer works. The way listening prayer works is that you tell me what you want. Tell me what you are worried about. Tell me what is foremost on your mind. What are you afraid of? What do you hate? What keeps you from sleeping? What can’t you stop thinking about? What are you doing a good job of avoiding? Tell me the dreams you hope will come true and why. Tell me one or more of those things and then listen for my response.

Are you saying you really want to hear those things?

Yes. I really want to hear those things.

Hmm -- are you sure? I’ve heard some people say that they think you are too busy to hear what they have to say and they don’t want to bother you with their “small” problems and worries. Do you have a response to that?

If it’s important to you, then it is important to me. Conversations do not bother me, even conversations about the littlest things. What does “bother” me is not being included in what you are doing. Think of the parent who just wants their adult child to call from time to time – at that level, the desire of the parent isn’t about a certain topic. Instead, the desire is to connect. The same is true for me: Let’s connect!

That’s interesting. You’re basically saying the opposite of what people sometimes use as a reason to not pray. They are worried, it sounds like, of interrupting you and maybe upsetting you because they interrupted you. But you are saying it is the avoidance of talking to you that you dislike?

Indeed. I prefer that you would communicate too much with me (as if such a thing were possible) instead of too little.

Got it – you are inviting us to talk to you about whatever is important to us in the moment or in the near-future or even in the distant future. But, there’s a second step, right? Praying is not only about sharing, it is also about listening for your response about what we shared. Moments ago, for example, when I shared something with you what I wanted, you then responded.

Correct.

So, from a first-timer perspective, how do I “make” you respond? How do I “hear” your response?

Good question! You hear my response by using your imagination. Imagine what I, God, would say in response.

Did you just say we should use our imagination to hear you?

Yes. Your imagination.

But what if I’m not that imaginative? How might I start imagining your response to me?

Think of someone who listens to you best. Now think about how they listen to you. Think about how they respond to you. Do they ask questions? Do they give encouraging responses to keep you talking? Do they repeat what you say in the affirmative? Do they keep you honest? Then imagine how they would respond to your sharing if they could read your mind and knew everything about you.

Whatever comes to mind when you imagine those things – write those ideas and words as if they were my responses to you. Then, respond to what “I” just said to you and repeat the process of imagining my response.

What if I don’t have someone like that in my life?

Then imagine how you want someone to listen to you. And then have that imaginary person respond to you as my voice.

Okay – I think I can imagine one or more of those things. But how is imagining your voice, especially based on someone I know, a practice of hearing your voice?

First, remember our first prayer discussion about hearing my voice. By yourself, you are not hearing all of my voice and what you do hear is heard through the “filter of you.” Therefore, you should never be 100% certain that you are hearing me correctly. Always remember this.

Second, to answer your question: Your imagination is actually how I talk to you. Imagination is where voices live in your mind – a parent’s voice, a friend's voice, your lover's voice, your favorite singer’s voice, Homer Simpson’s voice (doh!), your own voice, and yes, my voice. Some of these voices can be made-up voices or a combination of voices you’ve heard before. Other voices in your imagination exist as “protectors” that argue against the outside voices that speak against you. But among all of those voices in your imagination is also my voice. And, if you keep speaking to my voice, keep inviting my voice to reply, and then keep listening for my voice by imagining it – you will hear "me" reply. You won’t hear me perfectly (again, because of the Uncertainty Prayer Principle), but I will reply and you will hear me.

While this might be off-topic, I do want to point out that you’re not helping on the public relations front by saying your voice is in my imagination.

What do you mean?

Well, you know – you just gave more ammunition for people who say “God is just in your imagination.”

Well, they’re more right than they ever knew! People sometimes say the most ingenious things, don’t they?

I – I don’t think so, God. No. They don’t.

Well, I think they do – even if they don’t know it!

But about your concern: The people who wish to argue about my lack of existence are not our target audience. This conversation and The Listening Prayer Project are not about building arguments to prove my existence. You are not to be an apologist.

Instead, you are writing for people who want to better interact with me, who want to know me better. You are sharing these prayers for people who worry that I am distant or believe that they need to physically die before they can really talk to me. But they don’t have to wait that long – I’m here, with each and every one of you, and wanting to talk!

Is it sad or worrisome that my voice is in your imagination? Absolutely not! What this means is that my voice is an option that is available to everyone! Who doesn’t have an imagination? People with diminished or no hearing have an imagination. People with diminished or no vision have an imagination. Those afflicted with Alzheimer’s have an imagination. Everyone has an imagination! Even politicians, lawyers, and accountants have imaginations.

I was with you until that last line -- my dad was an accountant and I’m pretty sure he had no imagination.

Oh, but he did! It was just a very practical imagination. For instance, when you were very young, he imagined you attending a private Christian school and he imagined you attending a public school. In those two imaginings, he saw that he wanted a son who was exposed to the world, not sheltered from it, and acted accordingly by enrolling you in the public school system.

Oh, I see. I guess I don’t really think of that as an imagination, but you’re right. Solving problems based on predicted, but imagined, outcomes is indeed an imagination at work.

One more thought about why the imagination is a good place for my voice: For some of you, words aren’t your preferred communication medium. For some of you, the most potent understandings are emotional and for others of you, they are augmented with music or colors. For others, communication is best received through images. Still others hear me best through analogies or flashes of memories. Your imagination allows for all of these sensory inputs and more.

Ah. That’s a very good point about how imagination provides many different forms of communication with you. The more I think about this, the cleverer it seems…

Thank you. I think it is clever, too. There are very good reasons for why the imagination is the communication hotspot between me and you – despite the potential mockery that you mentioned.

So, how might we train our imaginations to better engage with and “hear” you?

By practicing. Think of it as exercise. The more you exercise your body, the stronger your muscles become. The same is true for your imagination with listening prayer. Practice listening prayer once a day, if possible. Make room for it during the day, at least 20 minutes – if you have a busy, scheduled life, put it in your calendar. Some people will discover that early in the morning is a good time for them. You, Nathanael, are not very communicative in the morning and prefer practicing listening prayer in the afternoon or evening. Each person will need to find what works best for them.

As I get started, what kind of expectations should I have for these first written types of conversations with you?

Don’t expect fireworks. Instead, expect a simple conversation. Plan to build a rapport before expecting earth-shattering results. And even then, the “earth-shattering results” will often be more of a cumulative result than a standalone moment.

What do you mean by that?

As we talk, certain memories, stories, ideas, and insights will help to build a “common language” between us. As that language develops, there will be moments of “breakthroughs” in terms of understanding yourself and/or me. And, those breakthroughs will also be added to our common language, paving the way for future breakthroughs. But, as you can see in this explanation, those breakthroughs don’t just "happen." They are nurtured by our daily conversations, conversations that may not even seem particularly useful or meaningful. And that’s ok because the breakthroughs are not the goal.

The breakthroughs are not the goal!?

I want listening prayer to be an experience that you repeat because I want to hear from you and I want you to know that I am with you. I want you to know that I will meet you where you are.

Do not be afraid of my voice. I have wanted you to hear me your whole life. Yes, I already know how you are, but I want to hear about it, from you, in your own words. Because when you share those words with me, then within that context, I want to let you know and hear my words of appreciation, celebration, forgiveness, encouragement, love, hope, and instruction that I have for you and about you.

What’s the best way for these written prayers to be structured? Should they look like the prayers on this website look like?

It depends. Are you someone who has a lot to say? If so, then maybe you need longer spaces to express yourself and then you might need to let me respond in kind, in a more extended way. In that case, the setup might look more like back-and-forth letters or emails.

Or, if you are someone who needs more encouragement to express yourself, maybe you develop more of a written listening prayer structure where my voice prompts with questions and compliments. In either case, the pray-er is encouraged to leave just as much time for listening as was provided for their talking. Again, each person will need to find what works best for them.

To your point, I have a good friend who has more of a back-and-forth style of prayer journaling and that person writes your words in all capitals. But, my daily listening prayers usually read more like two emails. I write an “email” to you and then you reply with your own “email.” I delineate the difference by using different pen colors. Black for me and blue for you.

I’m not sure the “two emails” format works very well as a written example for this site, though. But maybe I need to figure out how to present a few in that format.

I’m happy to converse in either format.

Thank you, God, for your experimental nature, flexibility, and insights. And thank you for your instructions on listening prayer.

Thank you, Nathanael, for listening and recording what you’ve heard. I love you. For those reading, I love you, too, and I look forward to personally telling you that and so much more once you start your own Listening Prayer Project.